Sparky

I'm heading out to the mid west in a couple weeks for my bi-annual travels. Every time I'm there I get shit for not letting Sparky know I'm rolling thru town. "I live right here dude, call we could hook up for a beer. Sparkys pretty awesome to by the way for a mid western hick. He was the sales manager for K2's big box brands 5150 and Morrow. Then he got a promotion that added skate as in rollerskates to his portfolio of brands. I let Sparks know I'm coming thru and a diamond turned out of a piece of coal. Or vice versa.

me- Into MN on the 21rst, out of Chi town on the 25^th. Bachmans sale is the ender. You got ample warning.

sparks- Nice – at this time I am around that week, but it has been thrown around for a circle jerk meeting at Dicks that week as well….

Dude what’s faster? A 5 wheel skate or 4? I’m thinking of doing that as some cross training. Looks like it would be fun to rip around the lake on.

I seriously hate you…..you should have seen the amount of spandex up in Duluth, MN last weekend….nations largest inline marathon…next year you should really plan to attend.

What? My kids like to skooter and I figured that it would be rad to have them raise the bars up all the way and have my sk8 long side. Hold hands with the old lady and shit. Should I get them ones that I can slip out of and still have the boot on? That way I could go get a cocktail or coffee and not ruin peoples floors with my multi wheels.

On one of the very worst days of my illustrious snowboard sales career – at least I can count on you and your demoralizing humor…I especially appreciate the – Hold hands with the old lady and shit – that puts a classic vision into my head that I just can’t resist to have a smile on my face. Maybe the two of you could share a Pepsi as you skate around Green Lake too? If you need one, I have some nice skate belts – they hold your keys, wallet, and water bottle – you don’t have to put just water in the bottle though…if you know what I mean..

Your worst and I’m smiling? That sucks. Sorry. Hey, you know what? Go grab a pop and a cheese stick, get in that lifted Chevy Avalanche of yours and do a peel out on some neighbor’s lawn. You’ll feel so much better. I’d suggest you covering up that TapOut decal you have on the window though. People will be able to identify the truck with a rear window that folds down to accommodate trips to Home Depot.

Have you ever thought about running for political office? I think you are wasting your powerful skills in your current position…the TapOut decal takes the cake….and actually the rear window gets taken out on trips to Menards more than the trips to Home Depot – even though I have both 100 yards from each other, and about 2 miles form my house – Menards tends to have better pricing and more of a selection. No peel outs either – I can’t do that to other peoples lawns, but I may go drink some Leinenkugels and go bow hunting after a day like to today – I do feel the need to kill something. If I get a deer, I’ll be thinking of you while I tear the anus out….

Thanks Sparky.