Sunday, January 28, 2007

SIA Tradeshow Trends

Some things that stood out at this years costume show in VegASS were:
-People insisting on wearing sunglasses indoors.
-Knit beanies were all the rage this year as INDOOR headwear. It didn’t seem that cold in there but…whatever.
-Youths under 20 were sporting bandanas over their noses and faces inside the convention center trying to prevent the dreaded indoor tan.
-Lots of big dollar designer denim on dudes that belongs on chicks. Back in the day we called people that dressed like that faggots, today your a skateboarder.
-Kids love them rainbow printed logo shirts. Like a white tee shirt with pink, yellow, blue and what ever color dots all over the place. Shit looks like a train wreck but man there are dudes backing it. Hard. Don’t forget the arm warmers.
-Face to face talking with people is a thing of the past. Why would you want to look at someone while communicating when you have a 2 inch piece of plastic that you can hold up to your ear and shout into. “Yo, where you at?” Also your dopeness factor goes thru the roof when you walk next to a friend and both of you are talking on cell phones instead of talking with each other. This is evolution.
-On the cell phone tip, there still are some people that didn’t get the memo that you’re a complete fucking dildo when you have a giant blinking blue earing attatched to your ear.
-It seems like if you got nothing going on with your brand then you instantly develop "technology." Hey check it out, our shits wacker than fuck but we got these new square tires that are gonna roll quicker than shit. Sure they are.
-The older industry broads get the skimpier their attire becomes. Bitch be 45 but be dressing like she got the rig of a 20 year old. I’d want one of their mirrors that convinces them that they look fabulous, then maybe my nose won’t look so big or my head so bald.
-Karaoke at your booth seems to sell more product. Especially when the people singing are shitfaced out of their minds. Solid effort people.
-You get more business done at the after bar than you do sitting down in your booth. 4reals.
-Misty next level hat steeze would be ball cap under the knit beanie, thus making it a visor beanie super sized and combo’d with a pair of fun glasses. This was peeped more than once.
-Kids are the new Cocaine and Hooker conversations. “Back in the day” you’d hear your favorite Rep spraying about the 8 ball he put up his nose or how much this hooker was, now it’s all about their kids. “Little Johnny can walk backwards as fast as he can walk forward.” Good job breeding.
-People love to brag about how little time they actually ski or snowboard. Like its impressive or something. “Yea dude, I haven’t even been on the hill yet this year, but in the spring I’m gonna really step up my game.” Then try and tell you how rad the technology in their product works.
-There are some fat fucks in the snowboard and ski business. Straight up. I’m talking 300 pounders and shit. These boys dress, act and talk like their participants. How? Do they put a Snickers Bar on the front of their snowboard for motivation?
-The ski aisles are still like morgues. Terrible. The vibe when you walk by one is that of desperation. It feels like when you’re in Mexico and the beach vendors hound your ass to buy a bracelet or something.
-Glen Plake is STILL rad. The dude oozes a passion for skiing that is undeniable. We need more people like him.
-The Croc count was minimal this year. Sad that such a fashion forward footwear trend is over so quick. Ya ever put those things on? Man are they comfortable.
-World Cup ski stars get 100 times more respect and admiration than a comparable snowboard star. I walked the show with D. Rahlves and people were popping boners left and right at the site of him. Jamie Lynn or Devun Walsh walks by and people are like “yea bud.”
-Ranquet Rules Modification 101. It is well known that you can only grab BETWEEN your bindings while performing the aerial maneuver known as the method if you’re from North America. Only if you’re from Europe can you grab IN FRONT of the bindings. In discussions with former shred star Travis Parker about this rule, he said it is now acceptable for a North American Citizen to grab in front of your bindings during the act of the Method IF you frequently travel to Europe.
-There are still kids coming to Vegas with dreams of super stardom. That they are going to dress the part, drink the beer and drop off a photo of them sliding a 4 foot park box and all of a sudden they become the next Peter Line. But even worse than that is that there are companies that are believing it and handing them product. I saw more dudes with the above mentioned attire (tee’s, bandana’s, glasses, beanies, etc) walking out of the show on Thursday with piles of Atomic gear. Time to beef up the resume for next year. That shit’s worth something on EBay.
-Kicker Fucker Chicken is in the house. Recognize.
Regardless of the glass half empty shit talking in the above words, the whole circus is still way better than actually having a job. Hi5 and double shaka’s are over, time to hit the hill. Got a 12 pack of twinkies for motivation. Actually the motivation comes from Joel and Tyler pictured here. Two of the raddest mother fuckers on the planet. Cheers boys.
Update from Stratton next.

8 comments:

  1. you nailed it buddy...

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  2. Club Pair a Dice10:37 AM

    Yep, great observations.

    But the only thing Yo "nailed" was his hand, day after day after day. Nothing like a dirty Vegas jerk, eh buddy? What about the mile high jerk?

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  3. Neff Headwear4:35 PM

    What about tight pants for shredding? Any of that?

    I'm working on that for next year. I'm gonna bring the Krew/Corey Duffel/Nut Hugger/Man Camel Toe look from skateboarding and bring to a whole new level with snow shredding. One of the worst trends ever shouldn't limit itself to the streets, it needs to be in the mountains amongst cougars. They really go well with Freddy Kruger sweaters.

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  4. Anonymous8:02 PM

    And the best trend of all, firing inadequate presidents of failing snowboard boot/binding companies. Can anyone guess who that might be???

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  5. Anonymous8:02 PM

    And the best trend of all, firing inadequate presidents of failing snowboard boot/binding companies. Can anyone guess who that might be???

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  6. Alex Silva12:25 PM

    I give up, who is it? Salomon? Who?

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  7. no mention of the stupid tech? oh wait i see that in your demo postings....

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  8. This comment has been removed by the author.

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