Malkoski May

May High-Lights

Walka, Joga, Move-a-thon

Two years ago Lil Guy said "I'm gonna break the school record and run farther than anyone else at the walka, joga, move-a-thon Dad". Funny thing is that he doesn't run, and he had skate shoes on when he did it. He did 10+ miles in two hours. Then couldn't walk the next two days. For the next year he vowed to himself that he was gonna beat that and we got him some running shoes. It rained on that day and they did a half ass walka, joga thing inside. Milo was pissed. So he's waited 2 years to leave his mark at Northbeach, seeing how he's graduating this year and Friday was the big day. Thing is, two years ago, none of his friends cared about him being all Forrest Gump and running his ass off. This year though, a couple of the kids actually started to run cross country and could of /should of kicked his ass. But...homey put his mind to it and did almost 11 miles in a hour and a half. I got there and was running laps talking to him when the announcement came over the P.A. that there was a half hour left. He started crying while running. "Milo, what's up? Why you crying?" "Dad, I got to take a shit soooooo bad but I ain't going in!" He did 94 laps, and the next closest was 83.  Crap!

And Wiener, being the slippery hot dog that he is, is scheming big time here.  He shows up for his run, with a brand new pair of running "shose" and wants to crush big brothers record.  He rips out 84 laps in two hours.  Older kids had a hour and a half to do their laps while the younger group had two hours.  Still, 84 laps - 9 and a half miles. 
I ran in high school and when the coach would send us off to do a 12 mile training run, me and my bro's would cut thru the woods and do like 5 miles.  On top of that we would come trotting into the field right behind the fast runners.  Coach thought he had a few winners on his hand, till we actually raced the mile.  My fastest was a 6:14.  Basically fat kid speed.  So I'm scratching my head on where these two got this running thing...

Anyway, congrats Milo on what ever record you set on Friday.  Keep in mind though, that Wieners gonna slide his way past it in the next three years.

Memorial Day weekend

Every Memorial weekend I always end up getting a little twitchin going in my drinking arm from summers long gone.  22 years ago and for 3 consecutive summers after that, this was the weekend that you moved into your summer house down on CAPE COD and drink your face off for 3 months straight, then move out on Labor Day weekend and try to figure out what the hell you were going to do with your life (thank GOD for Steamboat.)  You'd wake up with your liver sore, go to work, hit the gym, eat pasta or a grinda for suppa and then share a case of Golden Anniversary brews ($7.95 a case at the packy) before you went out to the bars.  Course money was tight so when the dance songs played, we'd scoure the tables for lipstick cups, cause beers stolen from beatches aren't as nasty as beers stolen from dudes. 
Things are a little different now than the days on the Cape, but this weekend I will pour some suds out in respect of all them lipstick beers. 

Chip, the Rug Stud and I with the Bud girls at the Improper Bostonian, 1989.  Notice Chips black eye from getting our asses kicked.  Happy Memorial Weekend.

3 Legends of snowboarding

More email submissions to the BOX.  This one from T-Sabs:

"Palmer(555), C Roach(255), Sabatella(152)"

Burrrrrrrrpppppp!

Big en

This was the first email I opened up today from our dude back east:  "p.s. they're here!  Bet this makes your cock hard!" 
BOING!

Congrats Sky

Bro-Cal C3 bro Skyler and new wife Kristen.  Congrats guy!  Frappe that shit UP!

Sleepy Overload

Who thinks that snowboarders should be banned from all ski slopes?

"Who else thinks that snow boarders are a growing disease on our peaceful slopes. They have slowly been increasing their numbers and poluting the ski slopes. I have created this group for like minded people who do think that snowboarders are a discrace and have no etiquette and should be banned from all skiing resorts. I would greatly appreciate any comments be it for or against snowboarders."

The above is a quote from their Facedildo page. I'm joining cause skiers are soooo safe.  You should join too and help stop the slope pollution.

Lemonaid

Damn.  Cause that's what's up.

Backyard fun

It's no Skull Mountain, but still...good fun.

Session'd

All season long, after a good shred we'd go into the bar for a well deserved beverage. And...loyalty has it's benifits. We always purchased Session when ever it was available and I always tried to shoot a photo and send it to our man Joe. I got a pretty good collection on my phone so before I delete em, I'm gonna share em.

Kaiser and Maxx from POW Gloves.

One more Tonto

Hor-Hey

Sweaty

Pell-ah-knee-grow

B-Rad

Kale Zima

Dirty Dusty Craven, happy birthday today by the way.  He's in Norway, bird dawging chicks and bangin beaver with the Danny and Dingdong crew.  Enjoy Craven!

Cousin Steve

Elan

Uncle Cookies

So funny having Russ Russ with us at Super Park.  I'd say 90% of the kids there had no idea who he is or what he contributed to snowboarding.  Snowboarding as a lifestyle that is, not as a sport.  An expression of ones self, and you can bet that old Russ Russ can express himself.  Did you know that sperm is a known anti-depressant?  Only if taken orally or anally.  That would be a Russell quote to the ladies. 
Anyway, here's a shot that popped up on Facedildo this morning that I think says it all.  Raw dawg Russ.  Yea Russell. 

Aussi Cover

Another cover!  Booya.

Email of the year

Got this the other day from a NW photographer that I met a couple times at a few of the local contests:


"Hi Johan, thanks for the official facebook friend accept! (and your blog is insanely good!) You are raising a damn good shredder man, whatever you are doing it's the right thing. Milo is an awesome kid and so much fun to watch ride. It was nice meeting you guys this winter, I'm stoked on how this year went. Here are some higher res copies of the pictures I have of you two this year, some of them are better than others, but I figured they would be nice addition to what I'm sure is an awesome collection of shots you have of him growing up.  Talk to you guys soon! -Adam"

STOKED!  A fathers day present early.  Thank you very much Adam.

Super Park 15, photo recap of the recap

Joel, Dangler, Jess, TJ.

Cocard

Brandon GoHard (Cocard)

GoHard again

 

Scott Blum

Craven

More Craven

Hippy

Andrew Burns, double pump methods on LOCK.

Our old bro, Bonus Carlson, killed it.

Dildodongs marketing manager Andrew Marriner getting busy.

 

Foot above the lip guy.

Stoke - eyed!  Killer, a mini Brisse in the making.

Season Final Snowboard Realms

Good stuff.  TJ's editing has gotten so good.

Super Park 15 edit

360 miles each way of driving = 7 - 9 hours of car time, depending on traffic.  Plus Uncle Russ sitting next to you on the drive down, jonesin to get busy and show the world that a 38 year old, ex super star of the shred world still has it.  Yea, there's two days out of your life, check Monday and Friday out of the weeks equation.  That leaves Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursdays activities to film and make a little edit.  Here it is.  TONS of shit's not in here as I didn't film each and every moment cause I was too busy screaming "holy shits" and "what the fucks" and couldn't double task and hit the record button.
For me going to Snowboarder Mag's Super Park 15, presented by Gatorade at Mt. Bachelor OR was a dream come true.  To watch all the shit go down live, with all the trials and tribultations that lead up to Johnny Shred getting the big trick was incredible.  And as a bonus, the fact that there was a little mini shred track that EVERYONE wanted to rip around on all the time made it that much more fun for me. Especially with all the cats that I got to ride with.
My job there was to...to just look after shit, look after the team so to speak.  Blue and George couldn't make it, so they reluctantly sent me.  I cooked, cleaned, shopped, shot REALMS footy, gave Advil, packed beers in my backpack, doled out sunscreen, carried tripods, was the gofer, drove and generally played the Dad role while there.   That was perfect for me as Milo and Mac have trained me to do this.  Speaking of, from the moment I got there, Pat Bridges the Captain of the ship for Snowboarder says to me "where's Milo?"  I'm like "huh, he's got school."  "Well you should of brought him, he'd of loved it here, you should drive home and get him for Saturday at least, cause that's the ride with the shreds day."  Yea right.  Then on the hill, see another mag dude T-Bird and the first words out of his mouth were "where's Milo?"  Scott Stevens "Hey Johan...where's Milo?"  Jesse Burtner, "you bring Milo or what?"  What the hell?  Lil guy would of loved being there that's for sure.  Riding that mini bike lap track with Stevens, TJ, Kyle Fisher and Cocard would of been insane for him.  Not to mention I bet he would of stepped to a couple of them hips and done all right.  Anyway, next year kid.  Cause Blue and George, you fucked up.  I'm there now.  Every year.  It's Disneyland for me.

Thanks CAPiTA and Union team kids as well as team captain Joel Frasier, for letting me be a dingle berry on the ass cheeks of your snowboarding.  Thanks Snowboarder, and especially thanks Pat Bridges.  The "oldest grom on the hill" had a blast. 

Enjoy.

Super Park

Shit...haven't been to Bend OR, in 20 something years.  The last time was in 91(?) and at the end of the shred season in Steamboat, 6 of us piled into a Escort and Subaru and went on a 3 week road trip with less than $1,000 each in our pockets.  First stop was in Ashland, OR to see a buddy who then got a DUI the first night we were there.  That cut that visit short and off to Bachelor we went.  I think we camped in the woods for 3 or 4 nights here and rode the hill every day.  Anyway, it's 2011 and I'm back.  This time for 3 days and a couple credit cards that have a little more than a $1,000 limit.  And I ain't drinkin and driving.

Brandon GO-hard (Russellism)

 Borg stepped to the big gapper. 

 Crusty Dusty warming up to the highest fs invert ever.  Not in this shot but still.

 Borgs kit.  Yep.

 Tan man.

Anyway, Superpark.  Shits pretty super.  Looka.

Free Tramp

My "honeydo's" this weekend. Tear this bitch down.

...and build this one.

Which only took 6.5 hours to complete.  Shits pretty tite.

Reblogged...

Stale Fish!