Shitty...week 4

A full month with the broom pusher under the nose and I got to admit, that having something this shitty on your face requires a little work. You’d think that running facial hair would be easy. Shave when ever because your letting things grow. But no, you got to stay on top of these things as they grow out of control like raspberry bushes. Crawling up your nostrils and around your lips. It’s kind of blowing my Sunday / Wednesday dedicated shaving days.

Flying out of Chicago I had a layover in Minneapolis and decided to do a little survey on who actually runs these things. Some interesting facts that I saw.

-90% of the dudes running mustaches wear glasses.

-80% of airline pilots have them.

-Typically you’ll find an upper hair lip on dudes that combo sport coats with jeans and tennis shoes.

-Most white men with mustaches are 50 years old and are on the verge of putting their earring from college back in their left ear.

-Middle Eastern males tend to like a skinnier stash while Asian males stay away from them.

-Extremely large smooth looking brothers seem to be the only ones willing to dawn a stash. Typically the aerodynamic trimmed down version of a Hitler.

-Hicks and NASCAR fans are prime candidates for a quality broom pusher.

-Same sex lovers like the just above the lip tightly groomed piece.

-Rich, successful men are facial hair racists.

-Frat boys, Hispanics and Ultimate Fighters prefer dick targets or intricately crafted facial pieces to mustaches.

God help me, I can’t wait to heal up so this thing goes away.