Picklesteins Reflections

It's hard to believe that Milo's already 6 fucking years old. That means that 6 long years ago, I was green and started working for a bunch of WAPS in Seattle and my life took a big hairy shit. Three highly profitable years later, gallons of sauce, and a couple minor warranty freak outs, it was time to clear the head on a tropical beach in Costa Rica with even more sauce, cigarettes, several fat chicks and surfing. I'll be rat fucked if it doesn't seem like just yesterday. That was one of my many "primes". I really hope that Milo received more than a couple bars of wrapped up Sex Wax from his old man on Big #6, you cheap bastard.
Jeff Wirtanen


Well if you must know. Little fucker got a plastic jump ramp, Feelies (fake heelies), tech deck dudes, and other shit that I'm just gonna throw away when he turns his head.
Yes, 6 years ago, you paid rent, had a Jetta or something like that, wore Descente jackets, claimed Sun Valley was rad, broke bones when you moved to fast, did carisms for warranty calls - "if you drove a car off a lot, hit a tree, would you take it back and demand a new car?", proformed anything and everything, talked about getting laid, fucked fat chicks but told us they were skinny, were a closet drunk, need I go on?
YO

I haven't come a long way, baby.
I:
Get laid even less
Don't pay any rent
Always broke, can't proform even a Zippo for heaters
Get my Occy wiggle bullshit on quite frequently
Out of the closet proud drunk, thanks to You, Vegass, Red Bull and everybody at Northwave
Haven't used a carism forever, better get back on that program
Before every major conundrum ask myself WWLFDYK? (What Would Lonis Fuckin Do, Ya Know?)
Gotten a little skinnier and fatter, which is tough.
And it was even worse, it was a Phenix jacket, phaggot. That shit was bad, but free. Thanks for reminding me about that one.
Jeff